I'm lacking something; I wish I knew what. Let's see, what does everyone else have that I don't? I don't think it needs that much of an explanation. Let's put it this way: I'm not going to formal because I have no point in going. Or a decent outfit.

Not cool. Actually it is in a literal sense but you know what I mean.

IN this modern day and age, an apartment tenant should be granted certain unalienable rights, like knowing that the bug guy will come on a Wednesday if you need him on Friday and having a plumber who will fix the toilet if only to have it break somewhere else the next week. And hot dependable water.

but now we're going two weeks without any kind of predictable hot water and it really sucks! I mean somedays it will be colder than the cold water and one day it was almost at scalding, which was good, but then it went to frigid in 20 seconds. Plus we have random water pressure in the hot department. Triggle trigglr triggle. So we've been havig to heat tap on the oven to nmake it usable in the showers and stuff. Oh, I've tried to take a normal wash, but in 60 degree water, it's very tempting to just not get wet at all. NOT COOL! The complex offered to move us (with a 50 dollar transfer fee of course) but it would've been too much of a hassle. Ugh.

So here I am, dreading to turn on the water. Crepes.

And it just dawned on me that Christmas and New Year's fall on the same day. Why so long?

I'm going back to the start

So now that we've been two days into this vacation thingy (Halleluiah!) I've been getting back inot the things I used to do over the summer. And it's been awesome!

First of all, I'm rediscoering all the good music I've been missing. There's a new Vh1 channel o our cable that just plays music with NO COMMERCIALS!!!! Not bad. Heard that Coldplay song "The Scientist," and forgot how much I loved it. Plus the video is so cool.

Then I watched The Price is Right with pet activist Bob Barker this morning. But it's not the same without Rob Roddy, the announcer dude who always wore those flashy jackets where if you stared at them for too long you'd get a seizure. They got a new announcer guy cuz Rob died a couple of months ago. So now the show is as good as it's always been, but I'm just a sucker for hating change when it applies to certain things. Now I know Barker's up there, too, so I don't know what's gonna happen when he goes. But hopefuly he won't die b4 we go to college so we can all go to the show and maybe be contestants and be on TV and win the fabulous showcases and stuff.

And then we saw the lights at Winterhaven last night. It was so pretty; personally, I was expecting a little more but it was 930 and some of the houses had already turned off their lights. But there was this one house that had the awesomest thing. It was just a long string of blue lights going all around two large trees. So pretty; mom liked the spiderman house. Merry christmas from your friendly neighborhood Spiderman.

But now I must make up the ... let's see... 180 days of school.... carry the 3... I need to sleep for about a month I reckon nonstop to make up what I lost last semester, so I better get to it.

Laterz!

We fish ewe a mare-y Chrismoose and a hippo gnu dear.

fifteen pound balls

teheehee.

So I went bowling with some buds today. Not many people, just a closed circle. And you know, it made me think. Why don't I go bowling more often? It's an easy, minimally physically demanding, great way to hang out with your friends. It's cheap if you have coupons (we made 2 1/2 some hours on 5 bucks a person!). It's the bomb! Plus, at the alley on Camino Seco, they have DDR! Yay! I love it.

The only thing that aches a bit is my right ring finger. It's that I have a weird way of throwing the ball, I have it going forwards but spinning backwards. But, hey, it works; my highest game was a 149 today! 94 for a daily low.

Hooray for weathermen! I remember when they asked me in 3rd grade about what I wanted to be when I grow up and I said either a weatherman or a professionla bowler. yeah.

basically what I'm getting to (i think) is that I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. I've been putting engineer stuff on applications, but I have no idea what exactly an engineer does. I know what train engineers do, but what does, per se, a civil engineer do? No one's ever explained me and they expect m,e to be one!

So maybe I'll just take up the bowling thing.

The beautiful letdown

Yeah, I really like that Switchfoot album. wink wink. come on people, it's shopping season.

So I got my PSAT score today. And I didn't get nationla merit. Nope. I know it may be a shock to some of ya, but I'm not as smartas you'd liek to think I am. I mean Celeste got a 237; I didn't even break 200! Actually I socred higher on it sophomore year than I did this year. 204 vs. 197. does that mean I'm getting dumber? I dunno. I mean I shouldn't be that upset; 95 percentile is still damn good, but it's not damn good enough for anyone around me. I had friends who got 98th and were on the verge of crying.

Look at what they've done to us. We're pathetic.

I mean yeah I got 80 on math, like last year, but I went down in both readong and writing. (see? It would help if I could spel and have good grammer) But hey, so what's your main chance of getting good scholarships fly out the window; it's nothing. NO, but I'm seriously bummed. And now I'm here trying to figure out who I'm letting down more, everyone else or myself, and that's just sad.

But at least this dread of a year only has one more day until we're half way done. sigh. I really hate school right now.

I should be ecstatic and I'm only glad that I didn't screw it up more.

But then there's the argument that it's only a number and means nothing about the person. I should know that, but my life has never been anything but numbers so screw you.

Mood: Really pissed and disappointed but anxious
Listening to: The low pitched hum of the comp.

15 minutes in hell

So I ran a mile for weight training. Yes, I know, 15 minutes for one mile is rather slow. But what would you expect? There's this thing called inertia where if I try and run too fast I won't be able to stop and then I fall down and get hurt.

Hooray! No more physics for the next... 2 days of the semester!

As we gaze upon the finals ahead, I realize I only have 3! Yippee! BC, APUSH and ENGLISH. so maybe this year hasn't been as hard as we've made it out to be. It's just anxiety, that's all.

OH MY GOD! WE GET OUR PSAT SCORES TOMORROW! OH NO! HOW DID I DO? WHAT WILL BECOME OF ME?!

Stupid anxiety.

If anyone reads this and has a piece of chalk they would like to donate may I have one? I need to post something somewhere. And makes sure it's seeable and no watered down milky chalk. Nope. And you know how I'm a sucker for songs lyrics I like. That hasn't changed.

24 Lyrics
by Switchfoot

Twenty four oceans
Twenty four skies
Twenty four failures
Twenty four tries
Twenty four finds me
In twenty-fourth place
Twenty four drop outs
At the end of the day
Life is not what I thought it was
Twenty four hours ago

Already missing it

It sucks doing stuff in a class that you're not going to be in next semester. It sucks so much. It just does. I love drama, and then reading the spring play today only is only making me going to miss it more. I don't want to leave; I want to be the general or Tully or even the President, but, I can't. If you band people had to quit band (assuming you enjoy it) that's kinda how I feel about this. But the I can audition and be in advanced next year and stuffs.

But then my locker buddy won't have a locker buddy. I just feel so guilty about having to leave it. And we've been buds since 7th grade (8th for him) and, Idunno, it feels like I'm letting lots of people down, that's all.

Poopy!

Wait! There's more!

I love you and in the aftrenoon, I love you in the evening underneath the moon OH skinamarink a dinky dink skinamarinky doo. I love you... and they said something else.

Now, does that count as the first song I memorized the lyrics to? I was like 4 or something. Well, it was either that or R.E.M. and "Losing my religion" and then I went to Catholic school.

Sonny and Cher just popped into my head

And now they won't leave. It sucks. And the beat goes on. I think that's their song.

Hey last night at WalMart I saw this little kids album called Let's Go to the Zoo or something, and it had songs by Sharon, Lois, and Bram. I remember them; they used to have a show on Nickelodeon when I was little. And there was this elephant that always followed them around, and , tangentially, the White Stripes aren't bad; I've heard like 3 of their songs and it's not bad at all. Skinamarink a dinky dink. Skinamarinky doo. I love you. That's all I remember.

Hey, who wants to take me to Sno Ball?

Sometimes I think I just might be crazy, and the other times I am.

These boots were made for walking

RUN A MILE?! THEY EXPECT ME TO RUN A MILE?! Now, I know that's not the most, and that marathon dude would be like "piece of cake" but I'm not a runner. After 3 DDR songs I'm tired. I remember in middle school when I briefly had PE before I transfered to MathCounts that we ran a "mile" though I never knew exactly how long it was. Anywho, what I'm trying to say is I DONT WANT TO PLEASE NO!

As for you, you're taking the bus.

Everyone thought my play was a bit... innuendous. K, fine. Raunchy. So sue me. Because I know Grrenie wont do it anyway, and since I'm leaving, it was fruitless of me to put in so much wasted effort.

But that's how this cookie crumbles.

Basketball

Things keep bouncing all which ways, yesiree.

Dropped drama from next semester. I didn't want to; I loev drama, but guidelines are guidelines, I guess. Health and Driver's Ed: oh hoorah.

So Been bummed out all day. More tests and finals and presentations to work on. It's so little and feels like so much. Why? IN the future I'll be laughing at how easy this was. At least I sort of get it, now.

I just need to read faster, that's it. That's all the cause of my worries. I don't read fast; I go dum- de-de-du- dum- de- do. Next word.

Sorry I complain so much. Just don't get much opportunity to do otherwise it seems to me. But it is all about me. I am very self centered and stuff. I'm selfish in my being humble and modest. And I hate it but I can't change it.

If we're all such wonderful people, why do we all feel like crap?

But I should go back and try and read Moby Dick. Because I have to. If he gave us the winter break to finish it I wouldn't mind.

IN drama terms, this is the climax or the falling action.

Climax. hehe.

A lighter load

The paper is done, the battle is won, now let's have some fun, crap I still have English to do.

There's always that good and bad part about knowing that winter break is on its way, like Santa. It's two weeks away and...


Beep beep beep.


sorry, phone calls. One from Jeanne, one from ... a prospective student in need of a tutor? cool. When do I start. Saturday. cool. don't forget now. I won't. Hey i have a job kinda sorta. Great; there goes my free Saturdays, though. Well its in the mornings and no on'e awake then anyway so it's not too bad.

If it's not one thing, it's another.