affirmation

Sometimes you spend years trying to figure things out, and then sometimes there it is on MTV. Weird how it works out like that sometimes. So I'm flipping through the channels, when I see their dating game show "Next" is on. If you haven't seen it (and hopefully you haven't) 1 girl gets to date 5 guys one at a time, meeting the next guy only by rejecting the current date. Of course this goes in all dimensions of who's dating who. 1 guy dates 5 girls, 1 guy dates 5 other guys, 1 girl dates 5 other girls. The dater in charge can reject a person for any reason at any time. Has too many tattoos. Can't drive a go-kart. Has red hair. Slurps. Etc. So anyway I was watching this one episode where this cocky dude steps off the bus and immediately the girl "next"s him, and thus the date is over before it even began. They exchange some spoon-fed commentary and go on their way. The second guy goes on the date, and that one goes a little better. Meanwhile, the other guys in the bus, none of whom have seen the girl except for the one that already got rejected, begin talking to each other.

Other guy: "So how does she look?"
First guy who got rejected: "Flatter than the Great Plains."
Other guy: "So she's flat chested. But, still, it's Spring break. Would you do her?"
First guy (thinks for a second): "Oh yeah. Totally."

And I'm taken aback. Even now as I begin typing this I'm taken aback. Here are people my age totally engulfed by the superficiality of things. All the guys have tank tops on to show off their biceps, and the girls prance around in short shorts and spaghetti straps. Granted, this is TV. But I just can't help but think damn, no wonder we're the most narcissistic generation ever. I pray to God that I'll never be like that. And while that may be one end of the spectrum, here I am at the other end, still without a first real girlfriend, a first kiss, I mean at least I held hands one time with Jean back in high school but all I could think at the time was damn, her hands are cold. But, truth be told, I would much rather be here on this side that I am than be on the other side. Sure, I would've had a girlfriend, sex, and STD scares by now, but it wouldn't mean anything. I talk with my roommates, neither of whom I'm pretty sure read this (But if you do, HI ZACH AND NOAH!) and we just talk about all the fine ladies that seem to stroll by at a constant rate around the UofA campus. After multiple "Giggity giggities" later we have a laugh, but that might have more to do with male bonding than necessarily being superficial. But I digress. I hope that when I meet someone, maybe in a class, maybe at the bookstore, that there is something much deeper going on. I want to meet someone who can makes me laugh, someone I can hug when they're blue or just flunked a test and not give a second thought to it. Someone I can feel comfortable around and who can feel comfortable by me.

And another thing, I'm tired of all these MySpace fake hotties. Not because their spaces are just advertisements for dirty sites, but at the bottom of every page it says the same thing: "I don't want kids." Sometime down the road I'd like some kids, 2 at most. Maybe my problem is I'm looking too far down the road to see what's right in front of me. But, frankly, there are too many lights in the now and I can't see at all. If I can find someone who is walking in that direction too, away from the noise and hubbub, maybe we'll meet.

for kicks

Yay! I beat Jordan!

the light at the end of the tunnel

So I registered for my fall classes this past weekend when it hits me: I'm already half done with college (at least for undergrad). And all I can of are the following: CRAP; ALREADY?; damn. I haven't done shit. Well OK I've done well in school, made a couple of new friends here and there, but for the most part I haven't done squat. *words long forgotten never to be spoken again*

But anyways I'm theoretically 53 units away from getting the double major, which comes out to like 16 classes and a few labs and colloquiums. It might be 56, it's a tad shaky. So I can average out like 4 classes and a lab each semester and be home free. Seeing as I'm used to 6 classes a semester this excites me a bunch! I think I'm gonna do 16 units, then 12, then 15, then 10. Some classes are only offered certain semesters so that skews things a tad. But still, after this hellish semester of 20 units, the rest looks like a piece of cake! Sweet.

worlds unknown

so it looks like I'm going to Berkeley for the summer. Except now I need to find someone to sublet my apt. to.

I'm a little irked from my folks, though. At last, I think, this'll be my chance to have a truly unique and familyless college experience. But what's the first thing that comes out of their mouths?

"ROAD TRIP!"

So I might go up with them and then get dropped off at the campus (even though Berkeley's gonna buy me a plane ticket). I'm mixed. Sure, I want my family to be happy, but in a way its at my expense. So yeah. I'm not leaving til June, so there's some quality time beforehand.

the calm

1. SPRING BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. I think I figured out my schedule for fall. 18 units. eww. All Engineering classes. ewwwww. Well, if after the fall I decide to move to Alaska and become a hermit, at least I'll have a minor in Mechanical.

3. I am SO PISSED off at the college of engineering. They lowered their criteria for class standings. Used to be you needed 98 credits(~31 classes) for senior status. Now its 90. WTF?! I worked my ass off to get to 94 credits last year. Whatever. I'm losing more and more money to them by the day.

4. I'm (almost for certain) living at home next year. Well at least now I'm forcing my mom to get me a car. Here I am thinking that she's been really hesitant to give me freedom when I discover that she thinks I have too much. she told me that if I were a girl there would've been no way in hell I could've gone to the dorms last year, and maybe, MAYBE room with friend this year. I really don't want to live at home, because I know she's gonna complain about my room being messy and helping out with chores that I've pretty much avoided the last two years. And I admit I got lucky freshman year, signing up at the last minute and getting three ranndomly assigned roommates. Only one of the 4 of us was a pothead, and none of them were really jocks. Long story short, right now I wish my family were less Hispanic and more white.

The storm returns in 10 days.