The long way home

Even with a massive week ahead, I decided that it would be beneficial if I went with my folks down to Douglas. We haven't been down in a long while, I don't think since my nana died. Man, things have changed. And yet some things looks exactly the same. The most notable thing is that almost all of the shopping has scooted itself down to the border to be all buddy buddy with all the people coming over from Mexico. We didn't do much down there, just stopped by to visit my uncle and to clean up the graves at the cemeteries. Again, we hadn't been down there for a while, and some of the other graves were as badly kept as our familes'. One even had a tumbleweed sitting on top of it, poor person. I bothered to pick it up and make sure it doesn't get in anybody else's way. We visited 7 people easily. I'm pretty sure my mom would like to bury my nana next to my grandpa James whom I'm partially named after, but who knows how much that would cost. Sure, going to the graveyard is never something people wish to do, but it is something that needs to be done. It is respect for those who have parted before us, something I think we're losing ground of as generations pass.

We also stopped by our old house to see what it looked like. They took out most of the trees, replaced it with some stupid palms, and have been working on the interior. There were even people working on it as we passed by. Douglas does feel a bit like a ghost town. I miss how small it was, though. From one side of town to another literally took five minutes. They painted a 4-square field at my old elementary school. They put in a Subway in the mini mart a couple blocks from the old house. And most of the gas stations have changed their names.

I don't know, I could probably go and talk to a psychologist about these inner turmoil feelings I have about growing up, and my dad, and living in that small town, and how in many ways I miss that town, but Tucson is a better place for me to thrive. They say that 50% of people in the US live within 100 miles of where they were born, or maybe that's worldwide, I don't know, but it does show in a sense that we aren't all that mobile. There's a good reason why my grandparents decided to move to Douglas, be it work, or money, or family, but I don't as of yet see a good reason to stay here in Tucson. My aunt's place up here on the northwest side is nice, but it doesn't feel like a home. We're all running on different schedules. It's usually me and my aunt up first, and then my mom and my cousin come home from work at 8,9 in the evening.

Other grad schools I'm looking at:
Purdue
Rice
Stanford?

I have two shitloads of stuff to do tomorrow, and I'm not prepared for either. Sigh. Oh well.